I’m extremely lucky to have a good doctor, who listens, advises, and works with me, the patient. I shan’t go into huge detail, but we had another good talk on Tuesday, and I’m back on the full dose of happy pills. He says it’s encouraging that I can be distracted from my default grey state, even if only for short periods, as it makes it more unlikely that this is clinical depression, more circumstance based. So I’ve got to be more distracted!! I’m seeing him again in about 4 weeks to see how things are going. Fingers crossed for pink edges!
The medics, in this instance Nottingham Hospitals, aren’t so great. Doc has referred me onto them for two things : a reassessment of my troublesome shoulder, and the removal of a rather bothersome “blood mole” (he called it something ending in noma, it’s about 4mm wide and stands about 3-4mm from the skin) on my arm - bothersome because it keeps bleeding and when it starts it takes ages to stop. Both referrals have been done on a new NHS system called Choose & Book - you get a letter with a reference number and password from your GP, and you phone a central appointments line to arrange your appointment - sometimes even with a choice of clinic, so in theory, you’ll have a time and a place that suits you. Sounds great doesn’t it?
Except, as doc explained to me, Notts are particularly bad at not releasing appointments to this central service, because that would bump up their waiting times, and consequently screw up their target figures. No more appointments = shorter official waiting lists. This has happened with both referrals, I’m on the waiting list for the official waiting list, but in the Government’s eyes I don’t exist.
This fudging of figures isn’t, (un)surprisingly, unique to the NHS. I’m aware of another government department (not Chris’) who have a recorded message to answer overspill calls that don’t get through to their helpline. It tells the caller that all lines are busy, and that they can’t leave a message so they’ll have to try again. Because the call is answered, albeit by a machine, within the designated waiting time, and because the caller got an answer, albeit a pretty useless one, they meet their call answering targets.
Hospitals, countless public service bodies, government departments, schools, the list goes on - all have targets, all have penalties for not meeting targets, all have ways of circumventing the system so they don’t get penalised, all are top heavy in chiefs to play the game and lacking in indians to actually do the work. And at the end of all this there’s you and I, poor old joe public, trapped in a tangle of bureaucratic bunkum.
I’d call for a general election, but am not convinced we’d get a better deal from anyone else. Except maybe the Monster Raving Loony Party, at least they’re meant to be barmy.
